What Brings You Pleasure? A Guide for 2023
Hey everyone, welcome back to the grind, which I hope you’ll find to be less of a grind if you spent some time preparing for how you want to feel in 2023. For a recap of that post, see here.
For this year, I am prioritizing pleasure, inspired by Adrienne Marie Brown's pleasure principles.
Pleasure feels different to everyone, of course. But we all deserve to feel pleasure.
Here’s the three things I’ll be focused on to spark pleasure in my own life.
Rest for rest sake. I have been resting for two years, to recover from running an organization for a decade. Now that I have experienced deep rest, I want more. Tricia Hersey, author of Rest is Resistance: A Manifesto, says “All of culture is collaborating for us not to rest.” Yes, even that extroverted friend who’s trying to convince you that going out is better than staying in. Rest is more than recovery, more than preparation to take care of others. Rest is essential for us to thrive. What do you need to do to create space for rest in your life?
Embracing joy as limitless. This does not mean indulging recklessly, or consuming excessively. It means that I don’t have to regulate happiness or diminish excitement because there is “work to be done” or because it feels superficial. What would limitless joy look like for you?
Choosing yes. I have shared variations of this before. A friend once said to me, “if it’s not a hell, yeah, then it’s a no.” I find that helpful when I feel indecisive. It’s usually because I’m not respecting my boundaries. For 2023, saying yes has to feel like a choice, a desire, maybe even a yearning. A reluctant or obligatory yes is likely to result in frustration and resentment in the future. What would it feel like if you chose yes more often?
My theory is that the more I feel pleasure, the more I will want it. Pleasure begets pleasure. Call it a healthy addiction.
Thank you for being on this journey with me for another year.
Much love,
Sayu